How to Comment

I am not sure if people know how to comment on this blog, and I don't think I ever explained it. If you want to leave a comment to something you read, click on the pencil icon below the entry.

If you do decide to comment, please add your name at the bottom, especially if you choose to leave something rude (since they chose to remain anonymous, I will not mention the names of my Quincy- and Manchester(CT)-area friends who did so).

Comment if you want to say something about what I wrote, or even just to say hello. No pressure, though, but it'd be nice to hear from you!

Pumping Iron....err....I mean, Rubber

I've been meaning to get back to a gym again after moving out here. Today, I finally did so. I am now a proud member (well, I'm a member anyhow) of the WMU Recreation Center. I might have to pay, although that's not clear yet. Supposedly it costs $75 per semester to join as a staff member. However, they insisted on charging it to "my account," which to my knowledge I do not have. I don't suppose it will be much of a problem, tho. After all, they do know where I work. :)

So, my first day back since July went pretty well, although it will probably take a couple of weeks before I am back to lifting/pressing what I had been doing. I am devoting this Spring Break week ("Spring" apparently comes much sooner here) to kicking my body back into working-out. This means that I work my entire body quite hard (whereas typically I would do a more focused routine, with body parts split up over 2-3 days in the week). I intend to work my muscles to failure (e.g. 4 sets of 8 at high enough weights that my body will not be able to finish the last set). I should be very sore this week, which is a good thing, as it means I am working myself hard enough. My legs have been spaghetti for much of the evening.

Incidentally, the phrase "pumping iron" doesn't seem appropritate anymore. Most weights are being made of hard rubber. Somehow, I don't feel as manly "pumping rubber."

After I left the gym and came home to eat, I learned two very interesting things: 1) McDonald's has visibly changed the ingredients in their Honey Mustard Sauce, but for some reason it tastes exactly the same (so why change it in the first place?), and 2) My dog goes friggin' NUTS for the smell of Chocolate Protein Shake....ever see a dog beg to drink out of a glass? :-p

Let's just hope I am as excited tomorrow morning, when I most likely will groan with every movement....

Feedback is Fun

So, I read some of the feedback from my blog....apparently, someone would like an individual e-mail and feels that I have been rudely clogging their inbox with notification that I have a blog. I do recall sending out one e-mail inviting people to visit, and another as part of a forward for a happy monster thing that I thought was cute. Doesn't seem like "clogging" to me, but whatever.

Anyhow, it seems that this person is offended that I would choose to write things on my blog that I think my friends and family will find interesting. He or she cares enough to desire an individual e-mail from me, but apparently not enough to send one to me to which I would reply.

A couple thoughts: Firstly, this is my blog, and I will write what I want. If I want to write about ideas I have had or thoughts I have been thinking, I will do so. If I want to write about what I have been doing lately, then I will write that, too. Hell, if I decide to post a message about what I do in the bathroom (although I probably won't), then it'll be on this website. If people enjoy what I am writing about (and I hope that they do!), then I am glad. If not, well, I'm not forcing anyone to come back and read this blog ever again. This blog is primarily for those people who care about what I have been doing and thinking, and who appreciate my way of observing and commenting on my life (even if they do not know me...I have several visitors from other states and countries). Anyone else does not matter all that much to me.

Secondly, if someone wants an e-mail and would like me to know how they are doing, they are welcome to send ME a message. Complain about not hearing from me that way if you feel so strongly about it, but don't hide behind the anonymity of the Internet and say things to me that you don't have the personal strength to say directly. Anonymously complaining about me on my blog is like publicly bitching about me to my friends and family behind my back. Ironically, this is not a quality that makes me think "wow, I would really like to spend time corresponding with this person." I suppose anonymity is protective, too.

However, I do agree with this person's point: I have been lax in asking people how they are doing. I am interested in anyone to whom I sent the link to this site, and I'd love to hear about what you have been up to. Unfortunately, I find that I do not have the time to write individual e-mails to everyone in my address book....at least, not ones that would be detailed enough to really "count" as a good-enough e-mail (and if I did send such an e-mail to everyone, it would be incredibly repetitive to write the same long summary of my life 100+ times, especially since several of my friends are not much better at e-mailing than I am and I wouldn't hear back from some of them!). However, I intend to begin writing some individual e-mails, even if they are short.

So to that person, my apologies if you felt slighted. I would probably be sorry to have annoyed/upset you, if I knew who you were. Hopefully you still visit my blog to see this message, and you will write soon.

And to everyone reading this: How are you? What have you been up to? :)

It Only Takes 7 Numbers to Not Be a Jerk

A brief gripe.....When I call a friend, especially when I call for a specific event (for example, "Do you want to get together for lunch tomorrow?" or "I'd like to catch a movie this weekend, so let me know whether or not you'll be around"), I expect that they call me back. It's just really, really rude and disrespectful not to, and it leaves me hanging. I've tried waiting, and with some people that does not work. I've tried giving the benefit of the doubt (e.g. "Maybe the person is out of town"), but that is often not the case. I've even tried leaving my phone number, just in case the person somehow lost it.

When someone thinks of you, and cares enough to express interest in seeing you, return the call. It is polite, respectful, and shows you care. Don't be a disrespectful jerk.

Keeping the Mundane Fresh

I was at Meijer's the other day, and I saw a shiny-looking shopping cart, quite different and more stylish than the others. I began to think about what it would be like to soup-up and trick-out a shopping cart. However, I quickly realized how absurd that would be.

But what about a tractor?

Think of it. What if you got a John Deere riding mower, and tricked it out? In this vein, I offer you, my friends and family as well as the Internet community-at-large, my tips for tricking-out a tractor:

1) Put in colored Xenon headlamps (maybe a light shade of blue or orange)
2) Paint or put on some vinyl designs on the side, like maybe flames or a cool Puerto Rican flag
3) Install a stereo system onto the tractor, the kind with the pounding bass that makes the whole thing shake. This stereo system should have its own remote control
4) Buy a small windshield, and have it tinted a dark green
5) Weld a large, multi-tiered spoiler behind the seat (or onto the rear mower bag, if you have one)
6) Four words: Heated purple leather seat
7) Get some chrome spinning hubcaps (make sure they are glaringly shiny)
8) Put some pulsating neon lights underneath the mower (green or orange would be best)
9) Make sure you have hydraulic lifts on your wheels, the kind that make the mower bounce up and down (this will allow more people to notice your pulsating neon lights, too)
10) Install some Nitrous Oxide for when you need a speed burst to get your tractor over 150mph. Make sure to have a good handbrake installed as well, so that you can pull it as you cut the wheel and drift sideways to get around corners

You should now have the most x-treme tractor on your block. You are welcome!

Keeping Current on the English Language

For anyone interested, I have recently learned two new phrases, both of which pertain to homosexuality. I try to stay current on new slang and phrases in my work. I share this to be educative. Please do not use them hurtfully. Here are the words I learned in the past week:

1) U-Haul Lesbians: I learned this one from a lesbian co-worker, actually. It comes from the joke "What do most lesbians bring on a first date?........ A U-Haul!" This is a pejorative term used more within the gay/lesbian community (although it is also used by non-gay/lesbian folks as well) to refer to lesbians who begin living together very soon (too soon?) after they start dating. I believe I have some ideas about the dynamics underlying this, but I am hesitant to state them without some sort of literature or research to support it, lest I erroneously contribute to the stereotype. (hmmm....maybe another research project for me!)

2) Brokeback: This refers to anything of questionable masculinity. For example, "Dude, your fanny-pack is so brokeback!" or (to someone who is emotionally sensitive) "Your attitude is really brokeback!" A co-worker of mine and I are tired of all the "brokeback" jokes and defamatory comments going around, so we decided to regard "that's brokeback" as a compliment, affirming our connection with the more aesthetic and comforting aspects of ourselves and our lives. Said differently, we have reclaimed the word "brokeback!"

Now then, don't you all feel smarter?

Sleepy-Time Blues

I think most people have had the kind of dream which seemed so real that they still believed it for a little while after waking up, until they realized that it was in fact just a dream. At some point soon after waking, they think something like "wait...no, my sister did not really move to Idaho" or (and this is probably the worst) "crap....I didn't already get up, shower, and get ready for work."

I've been having different kinds of dreams. Twice now I've woken up not only with a dream-memory, but also with the emotional experience of the dream still with me. In other words, I wake up feeling what I felt in the dream, and I feel that way to some extent most of the day. Last week I woke up ticked off at nothing in particular, just in a generally pissy mood. Today was worse.

Today I woke up feeling really down. I remember the dream, and I know there is much rich material that can be interpreted. Therefore, I won't describe the content of the dream (not so much to avoid being known by those reading this blog who can figure out "what it all means," but more so to avoid it being interpreted by those people who only think they can interpret dream content).

I will say this, though: it was about an ex-girlfriend of mine, someone from a few years ago who may very well be "the one who got away"....although as I recall it, she kind of RAN away. Even though she was wonderful, I am over her (I have dated since). She was just unbelievably amazing, and I remember her every now and again. Such a shame, really.....

Anyhow, I woke up feeling down, just very bummed-out, and carried it with me through the day. Don't get me wrong, I didn't go through my day as bummed as when I woke, but I did maintain a general feeling of malaise and isolation. Chorus practice and doggie-kisses helped, though, and now I feel much better.

Stupid laying unconscious for several hours......

A Useless Statistic

In case anyone was wondering, 1-in-6 people do their laundry at 10pm on Monday nights. I know this because there are 24 apartments and three washing machines and driers in my building. I am looking at a basket of damp clothes which are waiting for the warm, airy goodness of a drier. So, 1-6 people do laundry at 10pm on Monday nights.

Just in case anyone was wondering.......

PS: If you are wondering why I am doing laundry at 10pm on a Monday night, the answer is quite simple: My whites get a twinge of pink if I do laundry on Sundays.....seriously....but so far, no such problems on Mondays! :)

What We Have Is a Failure to Communicate

There are certain things I do not need to be told, specifically those things which I already know or which I don't like to be reminded of. Information about my cable service fits conveniently into both of these categories.

I have begun to think that, although I do not watch television all the time (maybe a couple hours a day, which is far below the national average), I could watch less. If I could get rid of commercials and record late night shows to watch the next day, I would be able to have more time for myself and not be as tired for work the next day (some of my favorite shows end at 11pm or 11:30pm). So, I e-mailed my cable company about the cost of adding TiVo. They sent me back an e-mail detailing what I pay for NOW. It was almost as if they were trying to suggest to me "hey, you spend enough already, do you really need to add something else?"

I find this to be especially amusing because, apparently, my cable company and I are having communication problems. Being that the company is called "Charter Communications," and "communication" is actually in their name, I would have thought this would not be such a problem. I ask a question, they answer. What could be simpler?

I am tempted to send them another e-mail and point out this irony, but I am afraid they'd send me back my phone number and address or something.....

Doggie Love

I was feeling badly when I wrote my last post (actually, writing it out made me feel better, though still not fantastic). Thankfully, I have a dog to love and cheer me up.

Picture this: I sit on the couch, and Melisma comes over and sits next to me, so we are both at eye-level with one another. She leans in, licks my nose, then burps in my face.

Just darling.....

Am I Done Yet?

Someone recently asked me how one would know when they are done with therapy. Well, as I tell my clients when they ask me about this,

"Your therapy is done when my student loans are paid off. Stop asking dumb questions, that's why no one loves you."

Okay, so maybe I DON'T say that to anyone.

Most clients come to therapy because, in a general sense, there is something wrong that they don't like, and they want there to stop being something wrong. This could be problems they see within themselves, or problems they see with others (sure, because I can change people who aren't there in the room with me, right?). Sometimes they are ambivalent about change, but ambivalence is simply feeling two ways about something (in this case, both wanting to make changes and wanting to stay the same - what is the same is familiar and comfortable, even when it feels bad). Either way, the client is often emotionally unhappy, confused, or disconnected. Depending on the client's issue and the therapist's perspective, it could be understood as relational, cognitive, behavioral, skills-deficit, self-image, confidence, difficulty making choices, and/or inability to capitalize on their strengths. A therapist works with the client's view of the problem to help them to gain insight into it and what they might do about it.

In short, and to quote one of the premiere philosophers of the early 1990's, "If you got a problem, yo, I'll solve it."

When you, as the client, begin therapy feeling motivated and/or interested in addressing some issues (and "the issue" to be addressed often changes over the course of treatment), there are a couple of ways to notice when you are getting done with therapy. Perhaps foremost, when your motivation to attend therapy sessions begins to decline and you start to wonder whether you are done with therapy, that is often a good sign. This can indicate that therapy is not as much a priority, or that it is not as important/necessary/ or useful to you. Be careful, though, because people sometimes have trouble addressing deeper issues, and as a result can start to withdraw from therapy. I think that a useful distinguishing feature is whether or not your therapist is encouraging you to consider issues which you do not think you have; if this is the case, you may be in denial, whereas if your therapist does not seem to be encouraging you to address something else, denial is less likely. However, sometimes therapists, whether by error (we all make them) or due to inadequate training, can be mistaken about a problem. Still, most therapists can have a mistaken idea, but be willing and able to let go of it after exploring it or testing it out.

As a therapist, my goal is to become useless to my clients. When beginning therapy, clients often need more from me in terms of support, guidance, effort to "push" and challenge a bit toward difficult emotions/thoughts/experiences, patience, and helping to interpret deeper meanings and dynamics. One of my goals, and a really good sign to me that therapy is working, is when the client is not only (or not necessarily) feeling better emotionally, but also not needing me as much to do the work of therapy. Now, sometimes this takes longer than others; I have had clients who were done with therapy in as few as 1-3 sessions, others who ended after 10-15, and another who even after 11 months was still relying on me for support and was not yet ready to do it more "on her own." When you feel that therapy is less useful to you (and when it's not denial or avoidance of something difficult), this is another indicator that treatment might be winding down.

Related to this, if you used to have alot of "therapy material" to talk about with your therapist, but now find yourself mostly talking about "non-therapy material," maybe treatment is coming to an end. For example, a client of mine used to have alot of anger and insecurity (the two often co-occur) to talk about; now he's not having many problems with anger and insecurity, and he is spending much of our sessions talking about things like his father's new car, an interesting movie he recently saw, and other non-issue topics. When the conversations become more "social" than "therapy", it might be time to stop. However, it is also possible that this indicates another block and attempt to distract yourself and/or the therapist from something more difficult to address (I do not think this is the case with the client I used in the example).

Be aware, too, that there may be a difference between a problem/issue still remaining in some form and you still needing therapy. I have ended with clients who, although their life or emotional experiencing was not perfect, they had a good enough handle on it that they were able to manage it on their own; at the end, I had just been watching them do it without them needing much from me.

Always, always, always talk to your therapist about your perception that treatment seems to be drawing to a close. This will allow you to ascertain whether or not a professional sees your need for therapy (or lack thereof) in the same way that you do. It also prevents you from ending too soon. In addition, I see one of the benefits of the ending phase of a therapy relationship as giving the client the chance to say good-bye; this is not something that usually happens at the end of types of other relationships (whether due to death, break-up, falling-out, or drifting apart), and it can be a supremely powerful experience!

It's Only Stealing If You Leave the Store.....

I think I have found a way to signifianctly cut my monthly budget and save a few hundred dollars each month.

In a word: Meijer's.

For those of you who do not know of this wondrous Mecca, I will enlighten you. Meijer's is a HUGE store with 40+ check-out lanes which sells pretty much everything. Imagine a Super Stop & Shop (or Super Price Chopper or Shaw's, if you prefer), merged with a Rite Aid, a Target, a furniture store, and a Payless shoe store. Add in a hair salon, and a few other services, and you get something close to Meijer's. This place is so big that, from one end of the store, you actually cannot even see the other end. I once tried to walk from the grocery area to the shoes and, after walking for about a minute, it did not look like I was getting any closer to where I wanted to be! And not only is this place huge, but it is open 24-hours a day, 7 days a week. So, if I ever wake up at 3am on a Wednesday morning in a cold sweat, paniced as I suddenly realize "Oh no! I need sneakers, a picture frame, tires for my car, and frozen waffles," I am all set.

Also, there are more Meijer's out here than there are Dunkin' Donuts. Seriously.

Now, my grand money-saving scheme is based on the premise that it is not actually stealing if you don't take the merchandise out of the store.

Here's the plan: Since Meijer's is open 24-7, I figure I can just go in there, pull some mattresses over to a relatively open area of the store, and prop them up in a large rectangle around myself. Then, I could drag a couch, dresser, table, and chairs over from the furniture department to put inside of them. Add some posters from the media section and some picture frames from Home Decor, and I have the beginnings of the most awesome fort ever.

Now, of course, I cannot just sit inside of my fort forever. I would get bored and hungry eventually! So, I'd strap on a pair of rollerblades from the Sporting Goods section and skate my way over to the other end of the store to buy some groceries. On my way back, I could pick up some magazines and books to read before bed. Also, I could get some shirts, pants, socks, and underwear from the Men's department so that I wouldn't have to be constantly wearing the same, dirty clothes.

Still, I'd have to go to work sometime, and when I did, the jerks at Meijer's would probably try to put all my stuff back and destroy my new home. Therefore, I would have to put in a security system from the Electronics department to ensure that nothing happens to my stuff while I am gone. Also, I could get some animals from the Pet department and train them to guard my area. Ever wonder what 40 watch-hampsters would do to someone? Screw with my mattress fort and find out, Part-time Customer Service Associate!

I wonder why no one has ever thought of this before.....

Can You Feel The Dumb Tonight?

Happy Valentine's Day Everyone! Since it is the day de l'amour, I thought it fitting to tell a story about a girl I almost met last month.

Before I begin, I'd like to say a few things. First off, I have met several wonderful people online (in fact, I met my favorite girlfriend yet through the Internet). I've also read extensively and done my dissertation research on Internet personals websites. This story should in no way support the idea that all Internet girls are screwed up.

Secondly, I want to say that, although there were things which were kind of weird, it didn't seem so bad to be any "deal breakers" until the end, when I took time to reflect upon the whole thing. At the time, I was making an effort to overlook some of the "kinda weird things" in order to broaden my self and, truthfully, to connect with another person out here. Now, all put together, I realize what I truly missed out on.

You know, it is not very often that I think to myself "Wow, this person is crazy!" And I am a psychologist who has worked with schizophrenics! AND I didn't think most of THEM were "crazy"....

But this one was. Oh man, was she ever....

As I mentioned, I met this person online. Mid-October, I think. She was 23 years old. I wasn't too impressed with her to begin with, but she seemed smart and insightful enough that I enjoyed talking to her online and, soon thereafter, on the telephone. She lived at home, never went to college, and was "self-employed" with a new EBay business. Now, I am not saying that there is anything wrong with any one of those things...possibly even two...but put them all together, and it is very unattractive. Strike one.

Another interlude...I have noticed a difference out here from where I grew up. When you turn 21 in the Northeast, you are supposed to go out with your friends and get really drunk. When someone turns 21 out here, they are apparently supposed to get married and have 3 kids. Early on in our conversations, the girl I was talking to wanted to know if I was here to stay, saying that she's 23, not getting any younger, and doesn't have time to mess around. At one point she even accused me of moving (is that really something that you can "accuse" someone of doing?) Strike two.

Furthermore, she not only lives with her parents, but intends to even after she gets married ("Why should my husband and I buy a house? I already have one."). This, however, was not a problem for me, as I never intended to be around the area long enough to marry her.

In addition, she said that she wanted to be cautious when meeting someone from the Internet, believing that there are weird, dangerous people online. So, she wanted to have our first meeting (which never happened...more on this below) chaperoned. Okay. By her dad. A little weird, but still okay. By her dad with a gun (doesn't this violate any concern I would have about dangerous people online?). Strike three.

Anyhow, we talked on the phone for a few months, as I was not in a huge rush to meet this stellar exemplar of female perfection. We enjoyed talking, we laughed, and we had very interesting, intelligent conversations. We did talk about getting together "sometime," and she seemed excited about this.

Then came January, which is really where the amusement came to a crescendo.

I saw her online one night, and I asked what she was doing. "Watching TV with my mom," she replied. So, I asked when might be a better time to call. She told me that calling right then would be fine. I did, and I listened to her watch TV with her mother for like 10 minutes, as they commented on the plot of whatever show was on. This was not interesting to me, I felt like I was intruding, and we really weren't speaking to one another anyhow. So I said I was going to get going, but would she like to get together that weekend? "Oh, definitely!" she replied. "You're not weirded out that my dad and I are going to abduct you or anything?" I told her that, while I had never been on a chaperoned date before (thinking to myself: "I'm 27 years old!"), and that it might feel a bit awkward for me at first, I understood where she was coming from and it wasn't a big deal for me.

I need to pause here for a moment to say that I really have no idea exactly what happened next. I truly got lost somewhere. Suffice to say, though, that it was both surprising and amusing to me.

Also, I didn't say two words from this point on. She just suddenly snapped at me and began yelling at me about something that started with "I don't want to be rude, but..." (which basically meant "I'm about to be INCREDIBLY rude, and I will pretend that by saying I don't mean to, somehow it will magically make me not rude at all). Somehow she went from saying "Oh, let's definitely get together this weekend" to telling me that I am really quite creepy, not at all funny, and some other things that I lost track of. She ended by saying that she never wanted me to call her again. Not surprisingly, given all of this in addition to what I knew about her beforehand, I was totally fine with that. Taken aback, but at the same time I really didn't care (and probably would not have called her again anyhow).

But that's not the *best* part, oh no! You see, while she was telling me all about her perceptions of me (which was very different from how she was acting toward me before), her MOTHER was in the background, SCREAMING at me through the phone about how I will be a horrible psychologist and that I need to find really desperate girls to date who won't ask questions!

Apparently there were questions, with which I had problems....

I am so glad that her mother pointed out what a horrible psychologist I am, as it is something that has somehow managed to slip by all my professors and supervisors for the last 5 years! I suppose if I were a better psychologist, I would have some thoughts about the kind of person who switches moods so suddenly. Also, the words "enmeshed family dynamic" would hold some meaning to me.

So she and I parted ways, both believing we have a story about a crazy person we met online. However, only one of us has professional credentials in assessing psychological problems.

And some people wonder why they are still single.....

A Knowledge Lacking

In talking to one of the Graduate Assistants at my internship this afternoon, I came to an odd realization.

As therapists, we are privy to incredibly intimate information about our clients. We know so much about them that they often haven't entrusted to anyone else. We know not only that they were raped, or that they hate themselves, or that they feel like they are going crazy, but also are allowed far enough into their emotional world to know what these experiences feel like for them. We know their fears, their insecurities, their secrets, their emptinesses, their loneliness, their inadequacies, their delusions, their anxieties, their shames, and their obsessions. We have been with them as they cried, become angry, or found themselves struck silent by a shattering realization. We are trusted with the parts of themselves which they believe make them horrible people. As therapists, we are allowed to know the most intimate, dangerous, vulnerable, and personal information possible about our clients.

However, if asked, we often could not tell you our clients' birthdays, pets, or favorite TV shows.

Does that seem odd to anyone else?

The Power of the Blog

I've heard people wonder (in general, not specifically about mine), "What's the point of a blog? Who cares about someone's random thoughts, and why do people feel the need to share these thoughts with the Internet community?" Whereas I had previously been one of the thousands (tens of thousands?) of people who created and updated a blog for more ego-centric reasons, I am no longer.

My blog now serves a purpose!

I noticed that one of the visitors to this blog is from an "Unknown Country." Apparently, my blog has the power to discover new nations, previously-unknown to the world-at-large. Yes indeed, a new land, about which the global community had been previously-unaware! A whole new community of people who, I can only assume, have heretofore been "unknown" to the world due to lack of contact with people from other countries. An entirely self-contained, self-sustaining nation never encountered by anyone else the world over.

And, it seems, they have Internet access, too.

I am incredible.....

Can dogs actually do that?!

I was walking my dog today, and something odd happened.

My dog is typically pretty calm, even outside. Sure, she'll get interested in a pile of something and really want to stop for an hour to sniff at it, but after a few seconds she usually will keep walking with me without much resistance.

Squirrels, however, are her crack-cocaine. Seriously, she sees a squirrel anywhere nearby, and she suddenly will sprint towards it, dragging my unsuspecting and unprepared body behind her until I can get a foothold. And even then, she's firmly planted at the other end of the leash.

My friend Alice believes that if Labrador Retrievers could talk, they would just constantly say "OH-BOY-OHBOYOHBOYOHBOYOHBOYOHBOY..." When Melisma sees a squirrel, it's more like "OH-MUTHA-FUKKA-HELLS-
YEAH-OHMUTHAFUKKAHELLSYEAHOHMUTHAFUKKAHELLSYEAH
OHMUTHAFUKKAHELLSYEAHOHMUTHAFUKKAHELLSYEAH......"

Anyway, we had such a moment today. It only lasted a minute or so, except she was actually able to sneak up on a squirrel and get pretty close (squirrels, however, are amazingly good at running up trees and disappearing from existence). Afterwards, I noticed that Melisma's nose was bleeding. A lot. So much so that she left a trail on the sidewalk for about a minute, and I had been seriously considering a trip to the doggie ER or something. However, I am certain that she never made contact with the squirrel, ground, or tree. And she didn't seem like she was in pain; on the contrary, she looked really, really happy.

Is it actually possible for a dog to get so excited that she gives herself a nosebleed?

WMU (currently under construction)

I had to teach my class today, and I was in a hurry. Yep, recipie for disaster right there!

Anyhow, the university might be building and/or renovating on part of the campus. I say might be because, despite lots of chain-link fences, I do not notice anything being changed or built within them. But still, they are there, probably for a reason.

Lately, I have begun to think that the "reason" is to piss me off. They block off pretty large areas of the campus; nowhere that anyone would need to be, but rather they are all on the way to where people would want to go, like, oh, I don't know....THE BUILDING I TEACH IN! Since they block off large areas, you can't really just walk quickly around them. They're like pseudopods from amoebas, except they come out of buildings; they don't just block off an area, but for some reason also cut off everything near it as well.

So anyhow, I had to go around these areas, which were very randomly placed. Following the fences, I figured I'd get around them more quickly. Nope! These fences lead into buildings. Yes, that's right! There are places where you actually have to walk through a building as part of the detour. Oh, and the building doesn't always open to the other side either, so sometimes it also involves walking out of the building through a different exit, and circling back around, only to find another fence!

Add to this that I could see through the fences to where I wanted to be. It was kind of like when you drive in a large city with one-way streets, get to an intersection, need to be at the place half a block on the right, but can only turn left. I felt like I was a rat trapped in a chain-link maze! I got really angry about it, too, having to keep turning around and try again (yeah, I was not very good at these mazes). It was SO FRUSTRATING, feeling like I was caged in. I tried directing my anger directly at the fences, but they didn't budge.

I made it to class on time (which was more than I could say for some of my students). However, despite all my rage, I was still just a rat in a cage.

My professional subspecialty

Often in this field, one develops a subspecialty, an area of psychology and therapy in which one has great interest and gains expertise. Sometimes this is very intentional, as when one purposely reads about a particular problem area in order to learn more about it. Other times, it just kind of happens that the person is somehow very expert in the area. Either way, it usually follows that clients with issues in this area are then referred by the front desk staff.

Mine, apparently, is treatment of water-aversion disorders and phobias.

Everytime it rains, and I do mean EVERYTIME, my clients either call to cancel or else just do not come in.

If only I knew how I became so brilliant in this area, I'd write a book. But I wouldn't be able to start it now anyway. I'd need to go to the store to get supplies, and it just started to drizzle outside.

And so she waits....

When I first moved out here, I was told over and over that the sun disappears over "the mitten" from somewhere around November until April or so. Not only that, but people warned to prepare for the bitter cold and tons of snow.

1) I'm from upstate New York. I have seen snow before.
2) It's apparently been unseasonably warm and beautiful for much of this winter (we have had some snow, but nothing to rival a Nor-Easter!)

So, since it has been sunnier, and the days a bit longer, I have begun to notice something quite adorable. I have a sliding door-window which opens onto my balcony, which faces my path to and from my car. My dog apparently has a great sense of time, because she is sitting at the window watching for me when I come home. When she sees me, she gets all happy and bouncy and then runs to my front door to wait for me and give me kisses when I come in!

Now if I can just find a woman who will let my dog train her..... :-p

Welcome to the Wonderful World of Me!

Hey Y'all.

So I've finally settled down and started my blog. It wasn't easy, either. I kept feeling like this first posting had to be great. I mean, I could post any dumb thought later, but this first one felt like it should be great, that it should really set a tone of both mature philosophizing and clever, insightful humor. A message that entertains, yet also makes people think as they laugh at and admire my fabulous wit and insight. So, here goes....

Poopies come from people's buttholes.


....Wait a minute.....God dammit.....lemme try this again....

Hi! Welcome to my blog. I plan to post all about my amazingly-awesome life here in Kalamazoo (yes, there is a real place called Kalamazoo), interesting experiences, random thoughts, maybe even some pseudo-psychotic rantings. Hopefully you all love reading this and hearing about my Kalamalife. If not, well, that's okay, I still like you....just not as much....

So, bookmark this page, and enjoy!